So, I went to the Dollar Store today. This is an amazing place, people. So many things you can get. All for just one dollar. You can get a ceramic toothpick holder shaped like a camera, or a little blue glass horse with flowers on it.
The best stuff:
A CD-Rom Encyclopedia for your computer. Imagine how much knowledge I can gain for just $1! A full CD encyclopedia. But the kicker? The real laughs? The CD includes 4 hours of music. Really? An encyclopedia?
A Book on Tape, but not just any book on tape, but a book written by Tucker Carlson, on tape. Cassette tape. The ability to get a Tucker Carlson book on tape for $1 is all the proof you need that Tucker Carlson is a dick and everyone hates him. For further proof watch the video where Jon Stewart calls Tucker Carlson a dick on his own show.
And then Tucker gets fired afterwards.
A can of meat. But not just any meat. Canned meat with Real Virginia Ham Taste.
Only one dollar. Mmm tasty! Is it dinnertime yet?