Saturday, January 21, 2012

Actual email I just sent via Zappos.com web form

Hi.
I'm a tall person. You ask me to get shit off the high shelves for you at the grocery store. You think it's AMAZING and MAGICAL to be tall. I'm a girl. You don't sell shoes for me at the store. You don't sell pants for me at the store. Or long-sleeve shirts. Or sweaters. Or coats. I am forced to go online to find clothing that fits my long limbs. I'm not a freak of nature. I'm 6'2 and have a 36-37" inseam. On Zappos (this is where you come in) you can search for pants by inseam. See, this is handy because NOT ALL LENGTHS FIT EVERYONE. However on Zappos, (you!) when you select inseam of 36, 37, you *also* get the inseam of every single pant that just says "one size" when you click on the link, yet in the description below it clearly states an inseam, of usually 30, 32 or 34. Could you PLEASE fix this so that the search for a 36 or 37 inseam actually gives those results? I have one pair of pajama pants that fit wonderfully, however sadly they are old and falling apart and I can't find new pajama pants (and one bad-ass pair of jeans would be nice) in the correct length, and really don't have time to wade through 100+ pairs of pants for SHORT PEOPLE WHO CAN BUY THEIR DAMN PANTS AT THE DAMN STORE.
Thank you very much.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Well, shit

Haven't posted since September? Damn.
I know what I've been doing.
1. I orchestrated the finishing of our kitchen demolition and rehabilitation. Moved home Sept 16, and handled issues well... until now, even. Our blinds are still fucking broken.
2. Played a shit-ton of patty-cake and peekaboo. Fed the kid, napped the kid, washed the kid, changed the kid, played with the kid, picked up after the kid, changed the kid's clothes, took the kid to fun things, bought the kid food, chased the kid around the house, outside the house, etc. Many, many hours are occupied with the kid.
3. Did fun things for myself so my brain does not rot. IE: Trivia.
4. Did stupid shit you have to do, laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, bills, sleeping, cleaning, lawn mowing, leaf raking, and other random bullshit that comes up when you have a life.
5. Getting sick. Over and over and over. At least once in Sept, and Oct, and Nov - Dec (for like two weeks) and again New Year's Eve. I don't know why I keep getting sick or why each time is worse than the last but I'VE HAD A FUCKING E-FUCKING NOUGH OF IT. THANKS.
6. Fuck, I don't know. I got a car, a haircut, went to Chicago for our anniversary, spent too much time on the Internet, worked a few hours, looked for jobs, had a promising interview, got the shaft, watched the entire seasons of Walking Dead, Breaking Bad, Storage Wars and Pawn Stars. And Mad Men (for the second time.) I said I was sick. I can't read when I'm sick. I can only sleep, whine, eat, and watch TV.
7. Eat. Goddammit I keep trying to eat healthy and then I get another cold and I just want to feed it nachos. This is not working.

2012 isn't starting out so great.