Current mood: exhausted
I'm falling apart. I don't know if it's the stupidity of adjusting to "daylight saving time" or if it's the fact that this week started out all wrong, or if it is because fall is here and now it's cold and grey and disgusting outside. (It snowed today, people.) But I feel like a bag of wet newspaper and discarded clothing. (I know, that's pretty specific right?) I cannot think. I cannot focus. I cannot concentrate. I'm exhausted. I am trying to work and I feel like a mess. Every little thing is an ordeal. I have been sleeping, maybe not enough? Maybe I need more sunlight? I haven't had time to adjust to this greyness yet? Maybe I need to exercise? Does everybody else feel like warm puppy vomit this week?
I get home last night and my head is swirling full of thoughts and emotions that have been blocking the natural productive brain flow this week. I've been drowning inside my head all week but today it's gone from tropical storm to hurricane. You know the feeling, it's one of those days where you feel generally ok, but it's like your brain is wound up and just won't shut up. It must be the normal cycle of things, just like weather, seasons, sun-up and sun-down, but it's like trying to see the sun through the clouds. All the grey mess is in the way. I go foraging through the fridge and find a pot of gold. I've got a bucket of jello shots left over from the halloween party and down them until I can't hear my brain anymore. Aah, the sweet bliss of a silenced mind.
I don't usually have to resort to such tactics to relax but sheesh, I needed a freakin break. Oh please bring me a day of sunshine!
Husband has requested we order pizza for dinner tonight, and I agreed and jokingly said "You'll have to hand me the phone, I can't get off the floor." Because seriously I'm exhausted. I wanna go home and curl into a ball and take a nap.
Wake me when it's June.